just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
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