I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Randomize
