I swear she didn't look like that last week.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
