i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
