if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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