David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
