Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Hippo gnu deer
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
