sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
