So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
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