last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
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