walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
When you're looking for your panties tomorrow, you traded them for a blunt on the train.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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