NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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