How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Having a midget officiate your wedding because you think it'd be hilarious: good idea or potential lawsuit?
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
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