xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
i think i just lost a toe
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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