I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
If you wake up tomorrow and start to wonder.... Yes you did just eat mild sauce from taco bell out of the package while informatively yelling about the loss of my virginity
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize