I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Randomize
