we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
