Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
Randomize
