Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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