I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
