we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
Randomize