I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Her roommate texted her and told her that her cat died. Now she's double-fisting bottles of wine while howling and wailing her dead cat's name. Not how I pictured this booty call.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
Randomize
