ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
Randomize