Cold hands, warm shart.
I'm eating all of the evidence.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
