I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
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