As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize