so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
I think someone shaved off all their pubes in the handicap stall or a werewolf stopped by the office to take a crAzy dump!
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