Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
