so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
No...this little piggys going to the bar
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
Randomize
