How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
3 2 1 whiskey
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
