hell yes lets make some ravioli
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Randomize