Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
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