I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Randomize