Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I need a "no soliciting" sign for your dick
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
