I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Like who needs a job and family when you can get drunk for free with strippers?
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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