...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
