Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize
