Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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