We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize