i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
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