Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
farters have to be the big spoon...
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
