No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
def just vomited mimosa in the gym trashcan. i weigh less already so i say its been a solid workout.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I don't deserve a penis
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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