If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
haha you were so trashed that you deleted all of your christian music from itunes and kept saying"c-ya God, nice knowin ya"
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Brb crying the tears of my youth
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
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