Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
UGH FUCK THIS TRAFFIC I WANNA SUCK A DICK
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Randomize
