escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
sexting loses it's worth when you accidentally text your boss.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
Randomize
