a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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