He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
You got in the cab and told the cab driver "we only have seven bucks so you better drive fucking fast".
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
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