Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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