you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
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