Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
one of my coworkers wanted to look something up on YouTube on my tablet. I didn't know how to explain why my most recent search was "girl fucks dog."
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
you never un-have a 4some
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Randomize