there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
Randomize
